“I love kids, don’t get me wrong, because without them I wouldn’t be where I am today, but they do follow me around to the most peculiar places. And they’re very loud! When they start screaming it’s sweet to see how enthusiastic they are, but I’m going to go deaf sooner than most people. It’s impossible to calm them down when they start, I just cover my ears.”
That’s what you get when you star in a movie that only little kids want to watch, Vanessa.
Sign posted in 9th Street Espresso:
Unattended children will be given an espresso and a free dog.
Pregnant Victoria’s Secret model Adriana Lima has this to say about how her life sucks now that she’s with spawn:
It’s funny because I used to love chocolate – I was such a chocolate lover until I got pregnant! But now it just doesn’t appeal to me at all. I haven’t really had any since I got pregnant. “I guess that’s a good thing since it’s chocolate and it’s probably not good for the baby to eat too much sugar, but I hope I get my love of chocolate back afterwards because I really did enjoy it!”
In case it wasn’t clear, Chocolate >>>>> Babies.
“I think women are afraid to say that they don’t want children because they’re going to get shunned. But I think that’s changing too now. I have more girlfriends who don’t have kids than those that do. And honestly? We don’t need any more kids. We have plenty of people on this planet.”
– the beautiful (and environment-loving) actress Cameron Diaz
Seth Rogen is officially our boyfriend. Check out these quotes from a recent interview he did while promoting his kids’ movie, Monsters vs. Aliens:
Now that the movie’s out and I don’t have to promote it anymore, I can say that I hate children. It’s out, it’s made $60 million. I can say it: I hate kids. If no kid ever came up to me, I would be more than happy. These guys bring their kids [to screenings] and I kind of resent them. To me it’s kind of a sacrilegious thing, and the kid would cry. It was horrible.
Funny and hates kids? Talk about a hottie.
1. She was great in “My Cousin Vinny.”
2. She won an Oscar for “My Cousin Vinny.”
3. After everybody said it was a fluke that she won an Oscar she got nominated two more times (including a current nomination for her role in The Wrestler).
4. Because she said this in an interview: “I’m not that big a fan of marriage as an institution and I don’t know why women need to have children to be seen as complete human beings.”
I was just talking to my publicist and he said, ‘You’re either pregnant or divorced today.’ And I was thinking, What the hell are they talking about? I’m 24! I mean, I got these calls that I was engaged way before it happened. I’ve also been pregnant several times. With, like, sextuplets. That must mean I’ve been eating way too many bagels or something. I’m not pregnant and I’m not going to be anytime soon.
–Scarlett Johansson in Harper’s Bazaar
Sing it, girl. I wouldn’t share let anything-or anyone-cut into my valuable Ryan Reynolds time.