place to avoid: the whitney

This horrifying article aimed at Australian parents who want to visit New York with their children, contains several pieces of useful information. Useful if you’re trying to avoid parents and their children, of course.

1. “The Kaufman Astoria film and video gallery on the second floor of New York’s popular Whitney Museum of American Art is the perfect place to breastfeed.” Well, OK, time to cross that off my list of good museums. I’d rather look at exposed boobs in paintings, thank you.

2. “New Yorkers love babies. Who would have thought?” I’m sorry, but this is simply not true. Exhibit A: this fucking blog. Maybe the woman who wrote this article only hung out with other sanctamommies or something.

3. “Don’t miss FAO Schwarz’s flagship store in the landmark General Motors Building at the corner of 58th Street and Fifth Avenue.” This is actually OK. No reasonable adult would ever go in there, anyway, so the breeders can have it.

4. “The Buckingham Hotel, 101 West 57th Street, Manhattan, offers regular family specials. The SupercalifragilisticexpealaSavings package includes a two-night stay for four in a deluxe one-bedroom, four tickets to Disney’s Mary Poppins on Broadway and a performance CD, from $US798 ($1117). See buckinghamhotel.com.” Dude, that is what I think hell must be like. Babies, stupid musicals, and having to pay $800 a night for the “privilege.”

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